Monday, February 19, 2007

The Coffee Talk Companion: "At Play in the Fields of the Bored."

The Coffee Talk Companion is an ongoing feature in which we dissect and discuss former Facts of Life star Lisa Whelchel's online journal entries.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Oh, sorry. We were just napping after reading this week's Coffee Talk entry. Lisa talks about how she surprises Kim Fields on the set of something called Good Morning, Texas. You know, we weren't even going to bother with this one, but, since we left you high and dry last week (thanks, JetBlue!), we'll give it a shot. A very small shot. You probably won't even feel it.

A couple of weeks ago I was running on the treadmill at our local fitness center. I was listening to my iPod but I look up at the television to catch a picture of Kim Fields.

OK. Just to note, there are more tenses in that sentence than in a roomful of Jews.

“Good Morning, Texas” was advertising that she would be a guest on the show the next morning. When I got back home I called my manager and asked him to call the producer of the show to get a message to Kim for me since she recently moved from L.A. to NYC and I didn’t have any of her new information.

Lisa has a manager??? Oh, wait. She probably just misspelled "manger." She called her manger. Which called Jesus. Who called Dee Dee. Who called Starbucks. Who called Justice. Who called his divorce lawyer. Who called us to tell us that Justice is madly in love with us and is leaving Maria as we write. And somehow Kim Fields got involved.

Yeah, that's totes what happened.

The producers asked if I would be willing to come down to the studio the next morning and surprise Kim on the air. I thought it would be a really fun idea. So the next morning I drove to the studio, hid out in the make-up room until Kim was on the set and then walked onto the stage at the end of her interview.

You know, if there were an Olympics for the saddest thing ever written, the above would be a contender for the gold.

I never could have imagined her wonderful response. She started crying and jumping up and down and fanning her face and laughing and hugging and it was so much fun! I immediately planted a kiss on her big belly where baby “Sebastian” is growing. It was so very good to see her. There’s just nothing like old friends!

Awwwwww. Sebastian. We got our hands on an ultrasound of Kim's big belly, by the way. Here it is:

Kim was on the show to promote a fabulous play she is touring with and starring in called, “Control Issues: We All Got ‘Em.” The writer and director, LaTerras R. Whitfield, was also on the show, as well as one of the other stars, Darrin DeWitt Henson. You may recognize him from the ShowTime show, “Soul Food,” or the current movie, “Stomp the Yard."

Actually, the show is called Issues: We All Got 'Em. The whole "Control Issues" nonsense was clearly Lisa's own problems coming to light.

Here's the link to the show's Web site. We have to say, it's a little depressing to see Kim on the urban theater circuit. We're sure Issues: We All Got 'Em is a marvelous piece of playwriting—the title itself is a wonder—but after 111 episodes of Living Single, shouldn't a sistah be rewarded with something more high-profile?

See, Lisa, there really isn't a god.

Oh, and is the Vanessa Williams mentioned in the cast list the Vanessa Williams? Surely it's not, right? Right?

Kim had to run off to rehearsal and I was on my way to my Thursday morning Bible study so we traded numbers, took a few snapshots, and promised to spend as much time together as possible while she was in town. I had to leave town the next day but Kim set tickets aside for me to see her play the following Wednesday evening. I brought my dear friend, Priscilla, with me and we both thoroughly enjoyed the play. I highly recommend you visit the director’s website to see if it is coming to a city near you. You will love it.

We thoroughly highly disagree with that last statement. Unless it is Vanessa Williams. Is it? It's not, right?

The next day, I met Kim for lunch and spent the whole afternoon catching up and then did a tiny bit of shopping. Kim’s baby is due in May and she looks even more beautiful than ever. And that is saying a lot! By the way, Nancy had her second baby at the end of December. Yes, we are all growing up, but we will forever be childhood friends at heart.

And, cue violins. No, sorry. Cue us going back to sleep. Look, people, we tried. But you have to admit, Lisa totally phoned this one in. Like, more than usual. There was nary a mention of Charlotte or Mindy, and Nancy only got one shout-out at the end. Come on. If you're gonna surprise Tootie, lady, at least regale us with some good details, not crap about where you hid in the studio.

Have a good week, y'all. In case you haven't seen it, here's the actual Good Morning, Texas segment on which Lisa surprises Kim. We're still trying to figure out if Kim's initial screaming is excitement or terror.